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Oh that dirty slut!

Inspired by Tearmatt (Sex is Key) – the topic for today is the Slut.

Call me stupid but I don’t see what sex has got to do with morals, any more than eating donuts. To re-phrase a rhetorical question often posed by religious gaybashers, would god have given us a sex drive from the time we hit puberty if he didn’t want us to fuck?  Nope.

Yes eating donuts can be wrong – if you’re eating them in front of a dying Ethiopian kid, or if you’ve nicked them from Dunkin’Donuts while the counter kid was in the toilet.  Yes donuts can be bad for you – that sugar goes straight to your thighs!  You can CHOKE on donuts if you eat them too fast.  But donuts as a moral issue? I don’t think so.  The birds do it, the bees do it, even the bloody trees do it (oh you slutty promiscuous green things, scattering your seeds all around the place!).

Personally I don’t enjoy sex that much if it’s not with someone I have a real connection with.  That said, I’ve had sex with at least fifty guys in my life, and I don’t feel bad about it.  Some of my dearest friends have been strangers I’ve taken home from the club one night – I guess I’m a good judge of people, either that or the real jerks don’t fancy me much.  I wear sexy gear when I feel like it and I like it when guys appreciate the assets.  I can pole dance (kind of, I’m totally crappy at it though).  I do what I want.

An acquaintance of mine has been known to have sex with three different strange guys in a day cause she craves sex by the bucketload – it’s risky, it’s undiscriminating but it’s NOT unethical.  Who does she hurt? No one.  If I like a man, I want to get physical NOW – I don’t want to have to wait till the magic ‘third date’, and why should I?

On the other hand, nowadays I pretend a bit.  If a man asks me how many lovers I’ve had, I’m kind of vague (that was after a boyfriend of mine said I shouldn’t be too frank about it).  If I go out on a date, I wait a bit, not because I want to, but because of strategy (if he really likes you, he’ll wait for you, and more to the point, you’ll wait for him..and wait..and wait…).  I don’t sleep with strange men any more – it doesn’t feel good to me.  I say ‘no’ a lot – because I want to.  But if I wanted to, I’d say YES – and so I should.  I don’t want to get STDs (the devil’s way of spoiling a good time?).  I try not to hurt people, and I understand that for men as well as for women, sex and caring are often linked – what’s one person’s zipless fuck is another person’s heartache.  Grown-ups know that and they’re careful and honest as well as horny.

If I ever call you a slut, it won’t be cause I think you have too much sex.  It’ll just be because I don’t like you much.

About turnipsforbreakfast

Rose has two blogs, www.butimbeautiful.wordpress.com, and www.turnipsforbreakfast.wordpress.com. Enjoy!

22 responses »

  1. great post! and a very wonderfully complex idea made so simple!kudos!

    Reply
  2. NormalDeviations

    I don’t sleep with strange men either…

    But, strange women are okay. The average ones are kind of boring. =)

    Reply
    • That’s very funny! I like that you like strange women – it makes me think maybe there’s people in the world who’ll like me, strange as I am, if I look hard enough!

      Reply
      • NormalDeviations

        “Maybe”?

        You’re selling yourself short. They should be so lucky — that’s a fact. I’ve got proof.

  3. The comments are almost as good as the post!
    I didn’t think I slept with strange guys anymore, and then I did…and I discovered that the “three date rule” might be even longer, because the guy I spent my time getting to know didn’t hurt me nearly as badly as the guy I just hoped into the sack with…though the sex was phenomenal with the hit the sack guy and lackluster with the got to know guy, which probably means they’re BOTH the wrong guy!
    The amount of men I’ve slept with is lost in the recesses of my menopausal mind, but, I think it’s probably around your’ 50 mark, maybe a bit higher, so, I think there are people who would consider me a slut, which is pretty funny since until recently (until hit the sack guy!) I thought I was a bit of a prude…
    Fact of the matter is, NONE of us live in Victorian England so the “moral Issue” is a moot point!

    Reply
    • You’re so right. Yeah it’s funny – I think the easiest guys to hold off with, are the ones we don’t actually want to sleep with, which is a bad sign. I probably will wait (that’s supposing some man wants to go to bed with me, sometime) just as a test for him – but it’ll be hard! And I AM a bit of a prude – as i tell every guy I hop into bed with, before he suggests strange and wonderful practices that would make me blush to recount.

      Reply
      • Oh my god, we’re kindred spirits! Lol!

        I DO have to correct an assumption about the guy I took time getting to know: I WANTED to sleep with him, and badly, but distance and life prevented this from happening…I still may sleep with him again, because, sex on the second go-around was better than the first, maybe the third will top that! (fingers and toes crossed!) I wanted to sleep with him as much as the guy I just hit the sack with…the difference on the downside is that the first guy? I KNOW he loves and cares for me and we will NEVER be less than friends, and dear friends at that! The second guy? Well, we’re SUPPOSED to be friends, but whether we actually are or ever will be is something that I won’t know until waaaay further down the road! Hell, I don’t even really know yet if I WANT to be friends with him!

        God, just think, if there were blogs when I was a fucked up teenager, I might not have been such a fucked up twenty-something! This is way healthier than journaling! (tee hee hee!)

      • Ha ha! YES! Sex and all that is SO complicated! no wonder we all (?) just want to find some reasonable guy and forget the whole dating sex romance thing. If there were blogs when we were teenagers, I don’t know about you but I would’ve made SUCH a fool of myself – I was that naive. But maybe people would’ve set me straight.

      • Oh, but the setting me straight might have done me good! occasionally I run across an old journal and I’m mortified by how I would just get stuck in the rumination…perhaps that’s having a writers deep lush soul…and I kinda wish someone would’ve kicked me in the pants, like they do now! Plus, for me, emotions were always such a goddamned secret, that according to my family, I wasn’t REALLY supposed to have…the blogs around I see that I’m not such a freak as I thought!

      • There are young ones of late, that have begun following me, and when I read THEIR blogs, I wanna re-enact that scene from “Moonstruck” (‘Snap out of it!’ says Cher as she slaps Nicholas Cage in the mouth!)
        Now, I certainly can’t say what life was like growing up in Oz, but, here in America there’s been a HUGE disconnect between an older persons wisdom and and a younger persons instinctive soul for a long ass time!
        Okay, I am so far off topic that I am just going to stop now…maybe this PARTICULAR topic will be a post on my blog one day!, Who knows!?!

      • Moonstruck. Should I watch it? Yeah you should write that post – I’m hanging out for it!!! (really – that sounded sarcastic but wasn’t)

      • well…I probably will (I really SHOULD be sewing!)(but I don’t WANNA sew, WAAAAAAA!)

      • you don’t want to and I can’t!

      • I don’t want to, but I should, cuz I’m sooooo poor right now, and sewing (combined with selling!) brings in money, which, at the present, writing doesn’t do…*sigh*

      • and P.S. I think ALL teenagers are that naive…part and parcel of being a teen!

      • Oh, some more than others. Have YOU ever met anyone who didn’t know what an orgasm was by the time she was 21?

      • no…but I was close! Virgin till I was twenty, when I gave myself a birthday present because I knew how flippin’ ridiculous it was to be a virgin at twenty….oh, the stories I could tell!

      • Same here – virgin at 19, thought, what the hell, let’s see what all the fuss is about. Likewise, the stories I could tell…(we should exchange books – I’ll read yours if you read mine!)

      • I would LOVE that…I appreciate your’ writing, you not only have TALENT, but SKILL as well (important distinction!) I finally started putting my chapters online because the writing group I go to is, despite being tremendously helpful, also more than a bit frustrating: you get to read for 10 minutes, which is, let’s face it, 1/3 to 1/2 of a VERY short chapter, then they discuss for 10-20 minutes. Really great feedback, but I’m so far ahead of them in what I’m writing, so I have to backtrack like crazy…If you’re serious, lets do it, cuz, I gotta tell you, I’m not all that secure with having my book online (what publisher will want to buy it if readers can already get it for free?)

  4. Only 50 men??? You’re just a slacker! Lol 😉

    But seriously, I couldn’t agree with you more, about the points you have made here.

    Reply

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