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Sex, Politics and Hotmail: Chapter 12: At the bottom of the Greasy Pole

A Tale of Two Women and their Push Up Bras

In a country not that far away, at a time not very long ago, a nerd with time on her hands hacked into the email accounts of two well-known women. She passed the shocking results on to a friend..who passed them on to a friend…who published them on this blog.  Can you guess who these women are?

THE STORY SO FAR….(Chapters One to Eleven)

Fed up with her billionaire husband Steve’s philandering, and longing for something more in life, Olivia Harris-Smythe has joined the Liberal Party of Australia to work for MP Clive Hamilton-Hogg.  Things can only go up from here..

oliviah@hotmail.com

I’ve met this gorgeous woman called Moira who works in Clive’s electorate office, and she says they have been looking for a volunteer assistant office manager for months, but no one seems to be quite right for the role.  She thinks I would be perfect, considering the experience I have had in the P&C, and organizing the mother’s club, and all those charity drives, etc.  I rather like her – do you think I should do it?  I wouldn’t want to short change Victoria – after all she is used to her mother being home most of the time, and as I said she’s going through a rather difficult time at the moment. Do you think she’ll cope?

purplerose@hotmail.com

Oh sure. We coped didn’t we?

Sounds like a golden opportunity to me. So what are the blokes like?

oliviah@hotmail.com

I’m past noticing that kind of thing.  But at least the people on our side are a lot more well-groomed than the Greens – they hold their meetings in the coffee shop just round the corner from Clive’s office and they are VERY scruffily dressed.  They seem to consist mainly of public school teachers and academics with carnivorous facial hair. I don’t see what’s so environmentally unsound about washing occasionally, do you?

But you know I’ve had a wonderful idea about Victoria!  I’ve suggested to her that she might like to join the youth branch, as there are a lot of polite, well brought up young people she could associate with and perhaps it would give her an interest in something useful to society, like civics or economics.  And that would keep her busy, don’t you think, so that she wouldn’t have so much time on her hands to spend with undesirable young men, such as Julian.

purplerose@hotmail.com

Young Liberals root too, Liv. Bet they’re even dirtier minded than socialists when it comes down to it.  What does Vickie say anyway? Is she keen?

This is what young Australian conservatives look like. Aren’t they lovely!!

oliviah@hotmail.com

Apparently not.  She says that would be ‘incredibly gay’.  Oh well.  Perhaps she’ll warm to the idea.

About turnipsforbreakfast

Rose has two blogs, www.butimbeautiful.wordpress.com, and www.turnipsforbreakfast.wordpress.com. Enjoy!

2 responses »

  1. “carnivorous facial hair”? Wow! That’s like some kind of twisted poetry prompt!
    Very funny… 🙂

    Reply
    • Is it? If it is, maybe you could write a poem! i was thinking of those guys that sometimes tried to pick me up at singles events, cause I look kind of hippy – they have lots of beard and not enough body fat!

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      Reply

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